Why the Avengers don't have alarm clocks
by JoMiSm
Summary: Because of two angry redheads, an anger issue, two tech-challenged warriors, and a very tired assassin. But mostly because THEY ARE ANNOYING. (One shot)


_**Lol, my sister and I started out talking about minecraft and ended up talking about Avengers and their alarm clocks. **_

* * *

**_Natasha_**

"Dammit, Stark, I told you not to get me another alarm clock." Said Natasha, holding up the shattered remains of an alarm clock.

"Sorry Nattie..." Said Stark sheepishly.

"You are not a good actor." Said Bruce, sipping his tea. Tony glared.

"You traitor."

* * *

**What happened?**

Natasha slept lightly, her gun in one hand, her other hand on the hidden knife under her pillow. She was having a good dream for the first time in a long while.

Natasha had never heard of the red room. Natasha was oblivious about SHIELD. Natasha's parents were beside her, helping her built a snowman.

Then the scene changed. A fire was all around her, everywhere. She couldn't move, she couldn't breathe, she couldn't see, _she couldn't find her mom and dad..._

Suddenly, right beside her head, an alarm clock went off. A knife and six gunshots all simultaneously ended up inside the stupid hunk of metal. "Stark." muttered Natasha.

"Quick, Bruce, act natural!" Said Tony, closing the holographic screen where he had watched her reaction to the clock. Bruce continued to read his book and sip his tea, having never watched the screen.

"She's going to kill you."

"It was worth it!" Said Tony.

That had been easy to say before he was confronted by an angry redheaded assassin.

* * *

_**Tony**_

"Go to _sleep_, Tony!" said Pepper, pulling the covers over her eyes, her soft orange hair the only thing showing above the covers. "It's too _bright_!"

Tony grabbed for his screwdriver without looking up.

Pepper stood up, pulling the covers around her shoulders. She shuffled over to Tony. "What are you doing, Tony?" She said, looking at the disassembled pieces of metal on the floor.

"I'm making it where the alarm clock will connect with JARVIS." Said Tony, putting down the screwdriver and grabbing his pliers.

Pepper blinked. "And you had to do this in our bedroom _why?" _

Tony shrugged, continuing to work on the clock.

Pepper sat beside him. "Is this really so important?" He didn't reply. She leaned her head against his shoulder. "Tony..."

Toby said "huh, oh, yeah, yeah..."

Pepper sat beside him until she literally fell asleep. Tony finished and looked over at Pepper, proud to show her, when he noticed her sleeping form beside him. He carefully picked her up, the alarm clock forgotten on the floor, and carefully put her back to bed.

The next day, the very tired Pepper was the crankiest anyone had ever seen her.

Tony decided it wasn't worth it.

* * *

_**Thor and Steve**_

Steve and Thor were watching T.V. On the couch, trying to figure out how to work the remote.

"I REMEMBER FRIEND STARK SAYING THAT THIS ONE DIMINISHES THE SOUND, FRIEND ROGERS!" Yelled Thor.

"Oh yeah, that one is the volume button." said Steve, pushing it tentatively. The volume went down.

"SUCCESS!" Yelled Thor.

As Thor crushed Steve in a hug, he accidentally pushed a button on the bottom half of the remote; the part that controlled Jarvis. Suddenly, a loud, irritating noise came through Jarvis' hidden speakers.

"Gah! Where's that coming from!?" Yelled Steve, bewildered.

"SHOW YOURSELF!" yelled Thor, looking around. They had just gotten used to the British man living in the walls!

A few seconds later, the sound got louder as it was programmed to do.

"AHHHHHHH!" Yelled Thor, randomly smashing objects.

"HOW DID IT JUST GET WORSE?!" Yelled Steve, running back to the remote.

He accidentally turned the tv to Dora. The two most annoying noises on earth competed for dominance: Dora's annoying singing and a stupid alarm clock.

Two hours later, Tony walked in to see the two passed out and Dora and the alarm clock still playing.

"they could have just walked out." he said, turning off Dora and the alarm, then walking away.

* * *

_**Bruce**_

"Tony, do you have a death wish?" Asked Bruce calmly from the middle of a crater of destruction.

"No! I didn't _mean_ to!" Said Tony, tossing some jeans to his science bro.

"Hm. Well, it kinda seems like you do." Said Natasha, watching from a rafter with a taser in her hand. If it wasn't for her, tony would be a billionaire pancake.

"IT'S NOT MY FAULT PEPPER WOULDN'T LET ME WORK ON THE ALARM CLOCKS AT NIGHT!" Said Tony defensively, picking Dummy up out of the rubble. Man, that thing is indestructible.

Clint walked in, spotting his partner in the rafters and the half naked scientist climbing out of the giant crater in the middle of the room. "What happened?" he asked calmly. When one lives with Tony Stark, not even an 'incident' will surprise you.

Tony sighed. "I decided to work on installing Jarvis into some alarm clocks since my first attempt was a failure." It was true. Jarvis had sounded like a teenage girl coming out of the alarm clock. Ugh.

"And he startled me." said Bruce, helping Tony pick up. Clint looked at his partner for a better explanation.

"Tony hit some wire wrong right as I walked in. The most annoying sound came out of the speakers... that tony had been making LOUDER for some reason." she rolled her eyes. "I don't think Bruce even knew that Tony was there, he was THAT absorbed in his work. "

"I knew he was there on some level..." Said Bruce, picking up his glasses.

"Anyway, he startled Bruce, which is when I got up here-" she said, gesturing to the rafters. "-and shot him with the SHIELD modified taser."

Clint looked at Tony. "Do you have a death wish?"

"Thats what I said!" said Bruce.

* * *

_**Clint**_

"Go to sleep, Clint." said Natasha, kissing his forehead and heading for the door. He hadn't slept for days and it was clearly visible in his face.

"I can't." he said simply. Natasha turned around without hesitating, crawling into bed beside him.

Natasha, who hadn't bothered to change from her Black Widow outfit, rested her head against his chest. "Go to sleep." She commanded gently. He was plagued with nightmares like her. In instances like this, they depended on each other to keep the ghosts away.

Clint sighed and relaxed. A few minutes later, Clint fell asleep, closely followed by Natasha. This was the only time they ever really slept well, but the teasing from Tony the next morning made it almost not worth it.

After a measly four hours, Clint's alarm clock went off at six. They both started awake. The poor alarm clock got twelve arrows, six bullets and two knives imbedded into it before it registered in their minds that it was the alarm clock. They both got up from their different places they were crouching. (Natasha was behind the bed and Clint was behind the chest of drawers.)

"Kill Tony?" Asked Clint.

"Kill Tony." Agreed Natasha.

* * *

_**And... Fin. ;D lol, review. **_

_**-JoMiSm **_


End file.
